Shelby on the Square
We had the most wonderful day today. This morning, I think Shelby smiled at us for the first time, and it wasn't even one of those reflexive gassy grins that usually comes before a poot! Scott was making funny faces at her this morning and I really do think she smiled back at him!
After feeding Shelby lunch, we packed her up in the car and took her to downtown Decatur. She napped happily in her stroller while we ate lunch outside at Mac McGee and got dessert at a fun pay-by-the-ounce frozen yogurt and toppings bar, and she continued to sleep while we strolled all over downtown. It was great to leave the house, get outside and enjoy the awesome weather.
I'll be honest: at first, it's very easy to feel trapped at home by a newborn's unpredictable schedule. I've never experienced something so tedious yet so stressful as watching the clock wondering when she'll wake up from a nap, when she'll be hungry, etc. etc. At the beginning it seemed like her schedule changed every day. However, she is becoming a little more predictable with every passing day and it's getting easier to anticipate her needs. She's even sleeping for longer periods at night!
I read every baby sleep book out there before and shortly after she was born, and I've used some tips and advice from all of them... and also ignored a lot of their advice! Some of it sounded great in theory, until it didn't work! I think when it comes right down to it, it's all about respecting a baby's need to sleep, establishing some kind of loose routine based on her needs but not watching the clock too closely. I am sure she will fall into more "by the clock" napping and waking routines as she gets older, but for now I am just enjoying being with her and soaking up every little moment, and trying not to get too stressed when she doesn't do something "by the book." We have been lucky so far - she really is a very good baby. She's happy, mellow and not very fussy at all.
I don't know how this post veered into a rant about baby sleep theories, but I guess I'm just saying it is possible to have a small baby and also leave the house to do things you enjoyed before baby! We loved going back to Mac McGee because it was where we celebrated St. Patrick's Day early in case Shelby was born on St. Patrick's Day, as Scott predicted. She was born the Monday after St. Pat's, and it was fun to go back there with her, even though she's still too small to enjoy the fish and chips :)
A Beautiful Surprise
Every Thursday, Shelby and I go to a breast feeding support group at the hospital. It's a good chance to get out of the house and talk to other new moms. On the way home today, this song by India.Arie played from a mix CD that my dance teacher gave me and I began to cry right there at a red light!
This song seemed to perfectly capture how I am feeling at this moment about motherhood (minus the line in there about being about a man). Sure, there are moments of worry and anxiety and sadness, but they are outweighed by moments of pure joy... moments where you can't help but cry because you're overwhelmed with this new kind of love that you did not even know existed before you became a parent.
That love is a beautiful surprise.
"Beautiful Surprise"
It's like yesterday
I didn't even know your name
Now today
You're always on my mind
I never could have predicted that I feel this way
You are beautiful surprise
Intoxicated every time I hear your voice
You've got me on a natural high
It's almost like I didn't even have a choice
You are a beautiful surprise
Whatever it is you came to teach me
I am here to learn it cause
I believe that we are written in the stars
I don't know what the future holds
But I'm living in the moment
And I'm thankful for the man that you are, you are, you are
You are everything I ask for in my prayers
So I know my angels brought you to my life
Your energy is healing to my soul
You are a beautiful surprise
You are an inspiration to my life
You are the reason why I smile
You are a beautiful surprise
One Month Old Today!
So, I know it was just a few days ago that we celebrated four weeks, but I thought we'd go ahead and celebrate one month, too, because in a baby's life, that's like, a really long time. I guess on certain weeks babies get to celebrate a weekly milestone and a monthly milestone. Lucky babies!
At times, it seems like the days can drag on forever (that's what happens when you're up at 5 a.m.). But when I look back and see that an entire month has gone by, it seems like the time flew by. How does that happen? We've learned, changed and grown so much this month... more than we ever have in our entire lives. Sometimes it seems like we just got home with her and other times it seems like she's always been with us. We love her so, so, so much. My throat is closing up right now just thinking about her. I mean... look at that impossibly cute little girl up there. How could your heart not burst with joy every time you look at that face?
New Mom Must Haves
Here are a few things that I have found very useful during Shelby's first month of life.
Aden and Anais swaddle wraps - these super stretchy, soft and oversized cottton swaddle blankets are great. Shelby is still getting used to the swaddle, but we use these for everything, from swaddling to covering her carseat when she's out and about.
Itzbeen baby care timer - this is a pretty simple little gadget, but it's great for keeping track of length and time between feedings and diaper changes. There's also a little button on there that reminds you what breast you nursed from last. This thing is awesome at 5 a.m. when you can't remember the last time you fed! We use this gadget along with little notebook to keep track of her wet and poopy diapers.
Carter's newborn clothing - Shelby is a petite girl and almost everything I had for her was way to big. I had a few newborn size onesies and recently bought a few additional snap suits and she's been wearing the heck out of them!
Fisher Price bouncer - a simple bouncer is great when you just need somewhere to put the baby while you go to the bathroom or eat lunch. We also sit her in this for a few minutes after feeding so she can digest her food.
Maclaren Easy Traveller - this stroller frame is awesome! Super easy to fold up and super light weight.
Washcloths - I bought a bunch of inexpensive washcloths from TJ Maxx before she was born and they have been great to keep on hand for spit ups and drools. I don't really think you need burp cloths - hand towels or washcloths will do. We also change her on a hand towel with a lap pad on top - no changing table necessary!
Thank you notes - keep a stock of thank you notes on hand so you can write a quick note (while baby naps) to everyone who brought you a meal or a gift during the first few weeks.
What are your baby must haves?
Flower Girl
A Growth Spurt
I think she's been experiencing a growth spurt this week. For the past few days it seems like she's been feeding at closer intervals during the day and what seems like non-stop in the evenings. This is called "cluster feeding" or "tanking up." She then sleeps for a slightly longer period at night - about 4 hours instead of 3 for the first portion of the night. Just when I thought I had a schedule figured out, she decided to change it up!
I did some reading and apparently growth spurts are very common during the first 6 weeks, when a baby's digestive and nervous systems are still very immature. I can't wait until she stretches out her night sleeps for a little longer... although I do feel a little sad that she is already getting bigger! I can already tell her newborn onesies are fitting more snugly. However, the upside is that she has longer periods of wakefulness and seems to be looking all around and taking in the new world around her. It's so cute!
Stars: They're Just Like Us
I was sitting on the couch this morning with a sleepy baby and a bag of Haribo gummy bears shoved in the couch cushion, watching some mindless reality TV when I noticed the characters on said mindless reality TV show look suspiciously JUST LIKE ME. Sleepy baby? Check. Haribo gummy bear bag? Check. Daddy on the Macbook? Check. Stars... they really are just like us.
Chubby Bubby
She also received her Social Security card in the mail. I think it's so funny when we get mail addressed to her!
Shelby's Birth
Looking back two weeks later, I am glad that I had the medication-free birth experience that I wished for. I had said all along that I had wanted a medication-free birth and did lots of reading about it, but when it came right down to it, I wasn't so sure I could handle the pain. I told myself that I would get the epidural if I wanted to but I ended up really not having time to even think about it!
I was dilated about 5 centimeters for about a week before Shelby was born and I had not been experiencing any contractions or false labor. On Monday morning, I woke up at about 5 a.m. with contractions that were about 30 minutes apart. Once they got to about 7 minutes apart around 8 a.m. I called my doctor's office and they said to go ahead and go to the hospital since I was pretty far advanced with dilation.
We finished putting a few things in our bag and off to the hospital we went, in Monday morning rush hour traffic! Luckily we live close to the hospital so the drive was not that bad. We got checked in around 9:45 and I was now 7 centimeters dilated - I had to decide NOW if I wanted the epidural. Honestly, up to that point, I did not think the contractions were that bad and I seemed to be progressing pretty rapidly, so I declined.
The contractions continued to get stronger and closer together, and by 11:30 I was ready to start pushing. I will always remember my "friend" on the ceiling... the fire sprinkler head. During the "count to 10" part I'd concentrate SO hard on staring at that fire sprinkler head. Scott said he'd never seen my face so beet red. I pushed for about two hours and she was born at 1:34 p.m.
Yes, it was intense. Yes, there was once or twice where I was cursing myself for not getting the epidural. But I just wanted to see her so badly, it didn't seem to matter! Honestly, I think I remember the worst part being afterwards, when the doctor was pushing on my abdomen to get my uterus to contract. That part was pretty painful, especially since I thought my hard work was done... I just wanted to see my baby! For about 2 or 3 days afterwards, I remember my arms being outrageously sore. I could hardly straighten them. That's how hard I was gripping the bed rails!
I don't feel like some hero or warrior woman or "better" than anyone else for having a medication-free birth. I respect every woman's right to have the birth experience that she wants. We all have the same end result - we are all mothers. That one day is special, but it's the days, months and years afterwards that really count.
Happy Easter!
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